J.R. Tschopp (a writer/movie guy) wrote this. Why he put it out for public consumption is beyond me.
The Greatest Menace to our Planet
I hate green beans. Hate them. I hate them with such a fiery passion that if it were up to me, all traces of this vile veggie would be eradicated from the face of the Earth.
Of course, that concerns me: what if green beans exist beyond this world? The last thing I'd want/need would be space green beans coming to this planet to wreak vengeance for the extermination of their terrestrial cousin. The cosmic, radioactive, colossal green beans would walk the streets destroying all in their path. Mankind would fight back, but let's admit it: we have no known armaments to annihilate the angry agriculture of alien asteroids once they have arrived in our arena. Alarming, isn't it?
No, I fear that as much as I would like to crusade against Earth green beans, the threat of a veggie menace from beyond the stars is too great. And so, as much as I despise them - they taste like feet! - for the good of my species and the love of my planet, I will allow them to exist. For now...
Maybe it's just a literary stretch before he gets to the real writing?
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
Sunday, December 7, 2008
Recent Dayton thing.
On a rare night when we all opted for McDonald's for dinner, Patty got the fish value meal. A couple bites in, she said, "I'm OK as long as I don't think about what it is I'm eating."
"Dead fish?" asks Dayton.
"Thanks Dayton, please don't mention it." She munched on fries for a minute and then picked up the fish sandwich again.
Right as she's about to take a bite, Dayton (in his best Gaffigan voice) says, "Fi-i-i-i-i-i-i-sh pockets."
Maybe you had to be there, but I LOL'd.
"Dead fish?" asks Dayton.
"Thanks Dayton, please don't mention it." She munched on fries for a minute and then picked up the fish sandwich again.
Right as she's about to take a bite, Dayton (in his best Gaffigan voice) says, "Fi-i-i-i-i-i-i-sh pockets."
Maybe you had to be there, but I LOL'd.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
iBrew
Tomorrow, I make my journey to Geneseo for homebrewing supplies/ingredients. I've been doing some reading and once you wade through all the math and funny names, it's not entirely different than baking bread. Yeast, patience, etc.
I'll most likely start with a Belgian wit or a cloudy wheat ... I know, not a huge difference. I'll also start with the shortcut method of a malt extract as opposed to all-grain brewing. I get the feeling using the extracts is like using training wheels: You're brewing, but not really brewing.
My goal is to be drinking beer I brewed by my birthday.
I'll most likely start with a Belgian wit or a cloudy wheat ... I know, not a huge difference. I'll also start with the shortcut method of a malt extract as opposed to all-grain brewing. I get the feeling using the extracts is like using training wheels: You're brewing, but not really brewing.
My goal is to be drinking beer I brewed by my birthday.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
It Takes a Village Inn
People who know me well know that I do not patronize chain restaurants unless every other option has been exhausted. With one exception. The Village Inn on 53rd St. in Davenport is a well-oiled machine that never falters. The service is always flawless, the staff friendly and the food well-prepared. The strawberry crepes at breakfast are amazing. Ditto on the crispy, buttery hashbrowns.
I'm not sure what the difference is ... Why I can justify going there. A lot of the chain restaurants just feel off, almost as if the employees show up to work and are in it for themselves with little regard for the group as a whole. Not so at the 53rd VI. Despite being a national chain, it gives off a vibe of a family run business. The staff there know patrons by name, greet people with sincere smiles, etc. I've been to other Village Inns and this is unique to the Davenport location.
OK, end of my chain rant for the day.
I'm not sure what the difference is ... Why I can justify going there. A lot of the chain restaurants just feel off, almost as if the employees show up to work and are in it for themselves with little regard for the group as a whole. Not so at the 53rd VI. Despite being a national chain, it gives off a vibe of a family run business. The staff there know patrons by name, greet people with sincere smiles, etc. I've been to other Village Inns and this is unique to the Davenport location.
OK, end of my chain rant for the day.
Another new hobby. Maybe.
Folks who know me know I have some sort of hobby ADD. I tend to get over-my-head involved in something, get burned out and then abandon it altogether. That's something I'm working on getting under control.
That said, I'm eying a new endeavor: homebrewing. I have a couple books on the way. I plan on doing my research before I just run out and buy a kit. I know what the plus is: I made beer. I aim to learn the negatives, such as cost, equipment, time, space for equipment, failure rate, etc. Perhaps I'll discover that just isn't a good fit for me.
Here are the two books I'm starting with:
How to Brew: Everything You Need To Know To Brew Beer Right The First Time by John J. Palmer
The Complete Joy of Homebrewing Third Edition by Charlie Papazian
If I decide this is something I can tackle, then hopefully in a few months, we'll be sitting around enjoying beer I brewed. If not, we'll sit around and enjoy beer someone else brewed. One of those win-win situations.
That said, I'm eying a new endeavor: homebrewing. I have a couple books on the way. I plan on doing my research before I just run out and buy a kit. I know what the plus is: I made beer. I aim to learn the negatives, such as cost, equipment, time, space for equipment, failure rate, etc. Perhaps I'll discover that just isn't a good fit for me.
Here are the two books I'm starting with:
How to Brew: Everything You Need To Know To Brew Beer Right The First Time by John J. Palmer 
The Complete Joy of Homebrewing Third Edition by Charlie PapazianIf I decide this is something I can tackle, then hopefully in a few months, we'll be sitting around enjoying beer I brewed. If not, we'll sit around and enjoy beer someone else brewed. One of those win-win situations.
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